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I awake, forgetting where I am. It took me a second to realize it was Monday. It's 6 o'clock and I can hear my cellphone alarm singing "You Belong With Me." I curl my toes underneath the sheets, trying to stay warm and wanting to drift asleep for five minutes longer. But I know if I do, I will fall into a deep sleep and miss my first class. I wish it was Saturday. The weekends fly by, while one class can seem to last a lifetime. There's no time for coffee. No time for breakfast. And the dollars I had for a vending machine were spent on parking. A walk to Starbucks is the solution.
Now I sit here and I wonder, "Is this what I want to do with my life?" I'm a senior. It's my last semester. And my biggest fear is a cubicle. Rows and rows of endless gray and white. I hope my career is full of color. The brightest of bright. Pink, blue, purple, yellow, green. Not gray. Not navy. Not black and white. No, full of beautiful, inspirational color. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had switched my major to graphic design. I nearly did the beginning of my sophomore year. I suppose it wasn't meant to be. And for now I'm here- at a computer, in a cubicle, with a gray wall in front of me. Three more months, I tell myself. Three more months. ★
P.S. I was recently interviewed by the wonderful Pretty Wonderland, which you can read here. She truly is a sweetheart. Leave her lovely comments! & I also forgot to mention that the lovely Danica of A Sight To Be Seen also interviewed me, and you can read that here. Leave her lovely comments as well!
Also, I now have a Formspring, so feel free to ask me questions. xx
Really interesting post. I never had any idea what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I always knew it would never include a cubicle, or grey walls, or endless paperwork. I'm lucky enough to have achieved that but really, appearance isn't everything and my dream job isn't quite living up to expectations.
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed you find what you're looking for. x
If it makes you feel any better, my dear, I still don't know what to be when I want to grow up...and I'm turning 30 very late this year. The thing is I wouldn't change a thing if I could go back in time. The journey has meant so much to me. You want your career to be full of color and so it will be. And if you ever find yourself in a grey cubicle, but you kinda like the job, that just means it's time to start bringing in things to decorate with.
ReplyDeleteI love this post... so hopeful. I always say that everything that you want in life will happen if you claim it... be positive and you'll get everything.
ReplyDeleteI've been there, done that. Now, I'm just enjoying life's perks... reaping the rewards. xoxo
Beautifully written and so true. I wish you the rainbow. <3
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that you won't be just another person sitting in a cubicle all day in a world full of gray and black and navy. No, I'm sure that you are certainly destined for a very exciting and colorful and wonderful future! (:
ReplyDeletethank you for linking me krissie!!! muah!
ReplyDeletei love this post, dear. i wish you nothing but beauty. <3
ReplyDeletecan i just say you all add color to my day. seriously. and thank you so much for lifting my spirits and inspiring me. i love you all.
ReplyDeleteawwwwwww. you make MY day krissie. your blog always inspires me. love you!!!
ReplyDeletethanks for stopping by my blog :) And this post is beautiful! What is your major? I also hope never to be stuck in a cubicle with nothing my grey walls. Luckily, the creative agencies I've visited are nothing like this, so I'm on the right path.
ReplyDeletesometimes what you learn in school isn't really what you end up doing :p that's what i've learnt. hang in there. and i'm sure looking at your pink polka-dotted blog will make you feel happy on a day to day basis!
ReplyDeleteOh gosh, I can't imagine having to make any decisions about my career. Hope it all works out, I'm sure whatever you choose you'll excel in xx
ReplyDeleteI get so confused when trying to think about what it is I REALLY want to do with my life too.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to decide, I mean I'm following this career path right now that I'm not particularly passionate about, I just started taking classes for it because I needed to get a move on my life, but I don't really care for it much.
At this moment I am in limbo, I'm trying to muster up the strength and courage to decide whether or not to drop everything, just quit with the boring stuff, and to actually pursue what I'm totally 100% crazy for at the risk of falling flat on my face...
it's a toughy...
I hope everything works out for you and you don't end up in an awful cubicle :)
xoxo
Olivia
Well, you're not alone, I too am so scared of a gray and white cubicle future. But I think what's important now is to do some deep soul excavation and find out whatever IT is that we really want in life :)
ReplyDeleteAnd whatever we focus on we attract! Have a happy week! :)
Thanks for the shout-out Krissie and thanks so much for letting me interview you! I love your blog so much. It's a great source of inspiration <3
ReplyDeleteaww, the cake.
ReplyDeleteI was in a cubicle once. I was exhausted from living a vagabond life and thought I needed more certainty, particularly because others thought so. It was fun at first, but grew tiresome very quickly. I was screaming at myself in my mind to get out, while the people I worked with attempted to chain me into their black & white world. I escaped, I found certainty on my own terms, and I am happy.
ReplyDeleteWe often live life by contrast. Experiencing the things we don't like helps to magnify our appreciation of what we do have passion for and discover what is really in our hearts.
I hope you go on to live the life that's right for you. Not the one others try to decide for you.
Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment."
Best wishes!
I love this post, so beautiful. Beautifully written. Very inspirational as well.
ReplyDeletei know what you mean. sinking into real world doldrums is maybe my biggest fear about the future.. even bigger than the one about not finding a job, hah.
ReplyDeletep.s. i definitely still have all of my barbies, as well! i think the number hovers somewhere around 20.
ReplyDeleteYou're too right! If ever I'd have a job it would be a colourful one. Your writing is rather lovely:)
ReplyDeleteSoooo cute:)
ReplyDeleteMost people get a totally different job than what they studied to be, so there is still hope! They make you choose way too early in life to know what you want anyway. You won't be the first nor the last, and I think a lot of those people get to go where they want eventually. Just do what feels good when the time is right.
ReplyDeleteAnd maybe you'll need a short period of cubicle-time to get to the colorful part, but I'm sure you'll end up in a great place.
such beautiful pictures <3
ReplyDeletei'm not sure what i'm doing either.
ReplyDeletethat last photo is so pretty! it really brings back a lot of childhood memories! =)
ReplyDeletehttp://pinkchampagnefashion.blogspot.com/
these are the best photos. i love the footprints one.
ReplyDelete