My poor little blog deserves better. I'm horrible at updating and have been for quite some time. I need to discipline myself to be consistent with my writing. That, and many things. I went to New York City a few weeks ago. It was my first time and I'd always dreamed of going. I had hopes of working there one day. These days I just want to travel and see as many places as I can. So there's one to check off the bucket list.
I traveled to the city with my cousin Ryan. After showing up at the wrong terminal in Phoenix, a flight-delay, being stuck in Charlotte, going to the qualifying of the Coca Cola 400 (Nascar), & staying at a junkie hotel known to host whores and drug dealers, we finally made it to New York, covered in clouds of grey. In less than 24 hours, I saw most things I'd wanted to see. From beneath my umbrella I walked through Central Park, Times Square and 12-miles of streets. We visited Union Station, Rockefeller Center and the top of the Empire State Building. The view was incredible, and it was surreal to peer down on a place so many people dream about.
We walked across the Brooklyn Bridge and saw the Statue of Liberty in the distance. Downtown was eerie. It was a Saturday and near Ground Zero was quiet and depressing as many walked to the entrance of the memorial. Staring up at the new 1WTC, it felt like there was little happiness here. Perhaps it was the rain and empty streets that made it feel this way.
We headed back to our hotel at around 7 o'clock. It was cold and my Converse-covered feet had enough. We ate Chipotle in our four-star hotel, the nicest I'd ever been in by far. Tom & Jerry played on a TV in the elevator. Snazzy. In the morning we boarded our 5:45 a.m. train to DC and spent the day walking from the Capitol to the Washington Memorial to the Lincoln Memorial to the Vietnam memorial to the White House to the Smithsonian and back to the train station where we took an early ride to Baltimore. That evening I could hardly walk. I don't think I'd genuinely laughed at my misfortune until that day as I walked at snails pace to dinner. I was glad to be going home to Tennessee in the morning, to see mom and dad, and rest.
The next six days in Tennessee included a drive to the Smoky Mountains, peering out at Chattanooga from atop Lookout Mountain, antique shopping and admiring mom and dad's beautiful land. It was the first time I'd been back since Slinky had passed, our nine-year-old Chaweenie. I put daisies on her grave. It still hurts thinking how she's no longer in my world. That's a whole lot of love I lost this year. I don't know that I've ever been anyone's favorite, but I was hers.
A lot has happened since I've been back. Work's the same, but my mind has been occupied with other things. I try not to be anxious. And I'm trying my hardest to put worry aside and let things happen and be content. Last weekend in church we were provided a piece of paper with the question, "If Jesus were to cross your path right now, what would you ask him to do for you?" The sermon was about how the size of your ask reveals the size of your God. How God loves it when we ask with audacity and BELIEVE with audacity. I wrote down my prayer & sealed my piece of paper in the Confidential envelope I was provided. I know that, in His time, my prayer will be answered. & my heart is so thankful to know such a loving, caring God.
On another note, three days after arriving back to Arizona, I went to the Mumford & Sons concert with my Christopher. The lawn was our seat. & it was a blessing to spend an evening listening to talented musicians. I spent the night rocking myself back and forth - sadly, I can't dance - and escaping into each song, every word in tune with the thoughts in my mind that week. It was lovely.