the worst semester of my life

UPDATED NOTE: ANONYMOUS FORMSPRING QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS POST WILL NOT BE ANSWERED. 

I've been thinking a lot about karma lately. So I wonder what's in store for a certain professor, that I'll leave nameless for now, who threatened to blacklist a group of young women. Early in the last semester of my college education, I was told a story by a friend. This friend had a blog and every new school year wrote a post on her classes and professors. Let's just say our professor wasn't too thrilled what she had to say about him. I don't know the full words, but I know something along the lines "you either love him or hate him" was written. He approached her, told her to straighten up and threatened to blacklist her in the community if she didn't. He's the head boss at his own firm in town and I'm sure he'd have no problem doing just that.

Sometimes I wondered if he just started teaching to gain power and make more contacts along the way. Teaching never seemed to be the real goal. The opportunity to possibly gain new clients and making sure he looked good to people in high positions was all that seemed to matter. Which is why he told us on day one there would be no going to the dean if we had any problems. Early in the semester I didn't find this strange. I simply thought he'd rather us tell our problems to his face, instead of running to the dean. Which we would have, if we weren't so terrified.

This was his first semester teaching. From day one, I felt uncomfortable. I don't know what it was. But it was enough to make me sick driving to class everyday and dread walking through the classroom door. Some days would be fine. Other days, not so much. Not knowing what the day would hold gave me anxiety, as did checking my email at night. My parents could tell you I was always stressed. He was the type of person that seemed to belittle your very existence, unless he loved you. If he didn't, you were out of luck. I think I was somewhere in the middle on his radar. Although I'm sure if he ever read this, which is a very high possibility, I wouldn't rank so high. In fact, I'm sure I can expect an email, with a threat telling me to straighten up or else. Or that this is all merely a "misjudgment on my part."



I'm ready for that if it's to come. Truth is, he has no right to do such a thing. In the same way he had no right to email a student telling her to have a drink before presentations to "calm her nerves" or "loosen up." Presentations that were to be held in front of fellow students, professors and the assistant dean. I'm pretty sure drinking on campus is illegal. Yeah, it is. And threatening more students on the last day of class, is not cool. Especially after, the night before, you decide to change their entire presentation because you suddenly decided you didn't like it. Neither is telling students what you don't like about them. "You never know when to shut your mouth," for example. I'm also told the first time he threatened my friend he said he'd never actually blacklist her, merely that he could. Because, didn't I tell you, he's not "that type of guy." In fact, he's a real humble guy. Egotistically humble, that is. If you have to remind someone how humble you are every chance you get, you're not really that humble.

Anyway, why did I decide to post this entry now, after I've already graduated? Well for one thing, I wanted to wait until grades were in to post how I really felt. And second, I've been wanting to blog about this for quite some time. If you read above, you know why I didn't blog about it sooner. Students have gone forward and spoken out about this entire semester, to my knowledge. But I doubt anything will be done. He's on the board of directors, or something or other, at the college. If I were the one with the email about taking a drink before presentations, I'd have already sent it to the papers. Men with power simply shouldn't be given the opportunity to threaten young women. At the very least, they shouldn't teach. ★

Have you ever been in this sort of situation, readers? I'd love to hear your thoughts.